If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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