google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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