We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
