Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
