There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
