Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
