i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Come see our sink grown plant.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
