I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
