We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
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