I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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