Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
God I need to hump something, right now.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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