just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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