chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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