Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
