my phone needs a breathalizer
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
