No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Randomize
