Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
