A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
