if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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