im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
