i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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