kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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