Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
