I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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