Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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