the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
