dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
