VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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