i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize