he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
