You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
