i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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