Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
barbara walters just said penis...
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
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