Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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