Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
