best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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