I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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