I want to have your abortion
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
