My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
