Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
