I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I love you.
Bad choice
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