Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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