I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
