If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
