That's intense
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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