Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
