haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
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