Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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