Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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