Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize
