Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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