Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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